One day I decided to get a credit card......
Bad idea.
Immediately I began spending all the credit I had on the card and before I knew it I had used it all up. I stared down at my bank statement and read how much money I owed.
For some reason I don't think I fully understood what a credit card was until I owed way more money than I actually had. I looked at all of the nice things I had gotten and then back at the statement. I felt sick.
Going shopping makes me feel happy. I love trying on clothes and feeling cute in a new outfit. Once I have my hands on something I love there is little to no thought about how expensive it is; I just swipe my card and walk out with my new purchases, grinning from ear to ear.
Sometimes I get home and look at the bags and think: you should probably take this all back to the store. But then I think about how cute that cardigan is and I remember all of the outfits I can create with it.
This sounds like "Confessions of a Shopaholic."
If only they had Shopaholics Anonymous meetings (they actually do, but they seem too sketchy to actually attend)......
After spending way too much money on this credit card, I determined (actually my dad recommended I get rid of the "dang thing") that I should cut it up.
The first time I attempted to cut it, I just couldn't. I looked at the dark, sparkly grey card and almost felt bad for even thinking about destroying it. So back into the wallet it went.
A few weeks later I was staring at another gut - sickening bill. Okay. After I pay this bill back we WILL get rid of the credit card.
So I paid all of the money back and found myself, once again, with a pair of scissors in my right hand and my evil sparkly credit card in my left.
It was almost as if, in that moment, a little white angel and red devil appeared on either shoulder.
Part of me was trying to convince myself that I needed to relieve myself of the burdensome credit card. I didn't have money to continue paying back so many bills. The other half of me loudly screamed: YOU NEED A CREDIT CARD! My mind began going through all of the "what ifs". What if I have an emergency? What if I run out of money somehow? What if my car breaks down and I have to call a tow truck? What if I need to buy a skirt for that missionary homecoming? What if ...
So I tossed the scissors aside and made myself promise I wouldn't spend a single penny on something I didn't 100% absolutely need.
By now you can probably guess what happened. A few weeks later I was yet again staring at a bill that was way too high for comfort. This time, I really did cut it up. A moment of silence followed as I looked at the broken plastic pieces that lay on the table in front of me. For a split second I thought, "Oh my gosh. What did I do?!" And then a wave of relief washed over me.
However, that relief only lasted for a brief time. After realizing that I no longer had a piece of plastic that I could swipe and instantly have whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted it.... the withdrawals came.
I would be in a dressing room, trying on clothes, only to realize I didn't have my credit card to use anymore. So I would leave empty handed, with my shoulders slumped and my head turned slightly downward all the while trying to erase the memories of the cute peplum top or the floral shoes. I would be out to dinner with friends, thinking I didn't want the money to come out of my checking account, so I'd reach for my credit card only to realize it wasn't in its normal spot. A pang of sadness would resonate through me as I'd hand my debit card over to the waiter. Walking through store isles and seeing all of the fun and exciting things I could buy became all but fun and exciting - those isles are now avoided like the plague.
I would like to say that the visits to Buffalo Wild Wings have subsided but let's be really real - they haven't. However, as I'm coming out of the withdrawal stages of my credit card addiction, I'm starting to see the green grass... and it's greener than I thought it was.
Not having to stare down at a HUGE bill every few weeks has become quite nice. The relief from knowing that I'm not spending more money than I actually have is far greater than the twinge of sadness I feel when I can't splurge while shopping at Maurice's - no matter how much I want to. Knowing that I only have a set amount of money in my bank account has helped me to see what I absolutely need to buy and what I absolutely do NOT need to buy.
Adulting is fun........ right??
Going shopping makes me feel happy. I love trying on clothes and feeling cute in a new outfit. Once I have my hands on something I love there is little to no thought about how expensive it is; I just swipe my card and walk out with my new purchases, grinning from ear to ear.
Sometimes I get home and look at the bags and think: you should probably take this all back to the store. But then I think about how cute that cardigan is and I remember all of the outfits I can create with it.
This sounds like "Confessions of a Shopaholic."
If only they had Shopaholics Anonymous meetings (they actually do, but they seem too sketchy to actually attend)......
After spending way too much money on this credit card, I determined (actually my dad recommended I get rid of the "dang thing") that I should cut it up.
The first time I attempted to cut it, I just couldn't. I looked at the dark, sparkly grey card and almost felt bad for even thinking about destroying it. So back into the wallet it went.
A few weeks later I was staring at another gut - sickening bill. Okay. After I pay this bill back we WILL get rid of the credit card.
So I paid all of the money back and found myself, once again, with a pair of scissors in my right hand and my evil sparkly credit card in my left.
It was almost as if, in that moment, a little white angel and red devil appeared on either shoulder.
Part of me was trying to convince myself that I needed to relieve myself of the burdensome credit card. I didn't have money to continue paying back so many bills. The other half of me loudly screamed: YOU NEED A CREDIT CARD! My mind began going through all of the "what ifs". What if I have an emergency? What if I run out of money somehow? What if my car breaks down and I have to call a tow truck? What if I need to buy a skirt for that missionary homecoming? What if ...
So I tossed the scissors aside and made myself promise I wouldn't spend a single penny on something I didn't 100% absolutely need.
By now you can probably guess what happened. A few weeks later I was yet again staring at a bill that was way too high for comfort. This time, I really did cut it up. A moment of silence followed as I looked at the broken plastic pieces that lay on the table in front of me. For a split second I thought, "Oh my gosh. What did I do?!" And then a wave of relief washed over me.
However, that relief only lasted for a brief time. After realizing that I no longer had a piece of plastic that I could swipe and instantly have whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted it.... the withdrawals came.
I would be in a dressing room, trying on clothes, only to realize I didn't have my credit card to use anymore. So I would leave empty handed, with my shoulders slumped and my head turned slightly downward all the while trying to erase the memories of the cute peplum top or the floral shoes. I would be out to dinner with friends, thinking I didn't want the money to come out of my checking account, so I'd reach for my credit card only to realize it wasn't in its normal spot. A pang of sadness would resonate through me as I'd hand my debit card over to the waiter. Walking through store isles and seeing all of the fun and exciting things I could buy became all but fun and exciting - those isles are now avoided like the plague.
I would like to say that the visits to Buffalo Wild Wings have subsided but let's be really real - they haven't. However, as I'm coming out of the withdrawal stages of my credit card addiction, I'm starting to see the green grass... and it's greener than I thought it was.
Not having to stare down at a HUGE bill every few weeks has become quite nice. The relief from knowing that I'm not spending more money than I actually have is far greater than the twinge of sadness I feel when I can't splurge while shopping at Maurice's - no matter how much I want to. Knowing that I only have a set amount of money in my bank account has helped me to see what I absolutely need to buy and what I absolutely do NOT need to buy.
Adulting is fun........ right??
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